Lessons In Leet

In a way, I must admit it has an encouraging quality to it. The idea of training those generations who were not born into the cyber era in the use of computers has always been a commendable idea and, for those so-called silver-surfers who did not lap up the technology as soon as it came out, it has meant a new way of life involving communication to relatives abroad, enhanced social lives (somewhat ironic if you consider the concept behind most e-communication) and the opportunity to learn more than ever before. But we have to ask ourselves whether there might actually be a line. And let's face it, Mr. Gates, I think there is one. I also think that you might - might - have stepped over it when you started to try and break down leet-speak as if you were studying Chaucer. For those of you who don't spend your evenings hooked up to cyberspace or games, leet-speak is a collection of slang terms which gamers, hackers and teenage MSN-jockeys like to use to communicate in a more relaxed and 'hip' way. And that's all you need to know. Trust me. You don't need to know how to write the word 'ham' in leet-speak, nor do you need to know that 'sploitz' may indicate that someone is getting ready to hack your system and make it take over your house. Because chances are that if your son is talking to someone who is mentioning sploitz, they're more likely to be cheating at a game than trying to break into the FBI mainframe. And yet, at the same time I'm struck with the idea that this might actually be a good thing. Microsoft is clearly doing their best to educate all generations in all aspects of computing. It seems a little pointless to leave a silver surfer with no abilities other than being able to turn on the PC and type an email when there is a whole world of unimaginable information and experiences to behold. Leetspeak is just one way of helping people integrate into a society that has grown to accept these kinds of quirks and trends as a norm. But be wary. Microsoft's stiff-upper-lip explanation of leetspeak is a little cold and a little bland. One stroll into the PC Gamer forums and you'll find that leetspeak is used as an ironic reference to the people that use it. In fact, the apparently trendy leetspeak is becoming something of a joke in most people's eyes. But that isn't to say that Microsoft's 'Leetspeak For Dummies' isn't a good place to start. Soon, you'll be displaying your m4d 1337-speaking sk1llz to one and all and will earn the respect of your peers and legions of 14 year-old Dutch teenage geeks. Ph34r the h4x0rs no longer at http://www.microsoft.com/athome/security/children/kidtalk.mspx And breath deeply.